On paper, Death on the Nile, should be a slam dunk hit. A few big names and beautiful people. A murder mystery set against an exotic backdrop with an eccentric detective at the center of it all, surrounded by eccentric suspects. And on those fronts, at least, it succeeds. But unfortunately the pieces that fill in the spaces between don’t quite measure up.
It starts right from the opening scene. For some reason, Death on the Nile starts with an origin story. An origin story of Hercule Poirot…’s mustache. There is some greater meaning behind what’s shown in this brief prologue, but much of it is unnecessary. It’s not terrible per se, but it sets a bad tone that the movie never quite fully recovers from.
Fresh off his case on the Orient Express, Poirot (Kenneth Branagh) finds himself at an Egyptian nightclub, where he meets or encounters several of the main players for the story. Front and center are Jacqueline de Bellefort (Emma Mackey, who you can’t convince me isn’t Margot Robbie) and her fiancé Simon Doyle (Armie Hammer). Hammer’s inclusion in Nile is, let’s say distracting. I won’t get into it here, but the rumors and allegations are…something else.
But when Jacqueline introduces Simon to her heiress friend Lynette Ridgeway (Gal Gadot), things start to go downhill. Simon falls for Lynette right away, and the two are married just months later. By chance, Poirot finds himself invited to the celebration. It’s here where the first of several clunky scenes take place. Poirot’s friend Bouc (Tom Bateman) gives him the rundown on why every single person in attendance has a grudge against Lynette. A grudge, in a murder case, would otherwise be known as motive. But perhaps no one has a stronger motive than Jacqueline. She’s been following, bordering on stalking, Lynette and Simon, to the point where the newlyweds fear for their safety.
Those fears become a reality when a murder takes place while on a cruise down the eponymous river. And so Poirot is on the case once again. With the boat secluded on the river, and everyone having a motive, everyone is a suspect. Can Poirot crack the case?
Again, that set up should be a winner. But there’s too much working against it, preventing Death on the Nile from achieving the heights you would hope. The beginning is too leisurely paced, taking just about a full hour to even get to the murder. Once that happens, the movie does pick up a bit, as Branagh finally gets time to shine as the famed detective. But the slow first half and frantic second half combine for a jumbled mess that doesn’t always feel like they’re two halves of the same movie.
Similar to its 2017 predecessor, the movie relies too much on the star power on hand (though it is noticeably smaller this time around), rather than actually delving into meaningful character development. Sure, there are attempts, and some actually do succeed (to a point), but there was so much potential wasted on this front.
But at least the stars deliver when given the chance. Branagh is once again the highlight; he seems to truly relish playing this role. Sophie Okonedo, as jazz singer Salome Otterbourne, is a personal highlight for me. She was absolutely eating every chance she got. She needed more screen time. And Gal Gadot was surprisingly decent. I think since Wonder Woman, her shortcomings as an actress have become more and more apparent. So it was nice to see her deliver a serviceable performance here. But her meme-worthy delivery of the “Enough champagne to fill the Nile!” line is every bit as awful as advertised.
But perhaps the worst offense of all is how lazily the actually mystery is set up. If you’re even paying a little bit of attention, you stand a good chance at solving the larger mystery before the murder even takes place. You may not figure out the exact “how” of it all, but the “who” and the end result are basically thrown in our faces. And that’s just a shame. Part of the draw of the murder mystery is trying to piece together the clues, seeing if you can solve it yourself. Death on the Nile robs you of that.
Through its faults, Death on the Nile is…okay, I guess? It has some fun moments, but could have leaned into the lighter side a little more. And even when the surrounding story isn’t quite up to snuff, the murder mystery setup adds a certain automatic level of fun. It’s nothing special, but if you like the genre, it’s probably a worthwhile way to spend a couple hours.
Score: 67/100
